David's choices

I slowly leave the house, lifting the door slightly so that it doesn't creak on the cement when I close it. I manage to keep it quiet so as not to wake anyone. I sling my satchel over my shoulder and off I go. It's still a bit dark, only 6.30 a.m. and a bit chilly, so it's a good thing I put on my hoodie.

I pass through the little pivots and land behind the Assemblé Nationale. I walk quietly with my headphones in my ears and my hands in my pockets. I finally take a taxi-bus and then a second one. I'm working today in Okala, so I have to be there at 8 a.m., which is why I'm out of the house early.

With the traffic jams and the hassle of transport, I arrived at the site at 7.50am. I pushed the barrier and found my colleagues, greeted them all and went to change in the studio. I found Gildas putting his bag away.

Gildas: Hey guy, how are you?

Me: Quiet and you?

Gildas: Still having the same problems you're having now...

Me: I'll be fine, man, cheer up! Did you go to the hospital?

Gildas: Yeah, the doctor says she's got diabetes!

Me: That's hot!

Gildas's girlfriend is pregnant and has contracted gestational diabetes. It's complicated, these things, the poor guy's salary is going to go on treatments, it's difficult, I can only wish him courage. We've received our instructions and we've started work. We're here to build a mini castle for one of the country's leading figures. I'm in charge of masonry and carpentry, as well as all the other small jobs on site. This house is going to be magnificent, and the plans are enormous.

The morning passed quickly, and at midday I went to buy the beans with the cakes (only the real ones know), which settled me down nicely, and I drank a small Coke, feeling full. I digested for half an hour before going back to work. The sun was at its zenith, the heat at its peak, and I was sweating so much I took off my T-shirt.

Gildas: hey guy, don't give us a hard time about your physique, we know you're well cut!

Me (laughing): ahahah leave it, it's nothing!

Gildas: But we're all doing the same job, aren't we?

I laughed and carried on taking my bricks and cement to build the kitchen wall. The day passed quickly, and at 6pm I went to wash up, changed and headed home. I arrived home, pulled the cloth at the door and went into the living room. My mother was sitting on the rattan armchair.

Me: Hello Mum!

Mom (smiling): Good morning son.

Me: How are you this morning, Mom?

Mom: aaah as you can see!

I squatted down in front of her and gave her a kiss. My mother is my whole life and despite her illness, she's still my happiness. I think I spoke too quickly when I felt someone climbing on my neck.

Maeva: Daddy!!!

Me (amused): My love baby!

I carried her and gave her lots of kisses and tickles. Maeva is my 3-year-old daughter, she's my ray of sunshine, the one I could and would give everything for. She's so beautiful, my daughter, all my pride and joy, and I put her down on the floor after a session of laughter and tickling.

Maeva: Daddy, look at my braids!

Me: Beautiful, sweetie. Who did your hair?

Maeva : Auntie Laurence braided my hair!

Me: Good!

I heard voices and then Laetitia and Laurence came into the living room. Laetitia came in to give me a kiss and Laurence gave me a peck on the cheek, then said hello to Mom in her smart-alecky way!

Laetitia: Have you been home long?

Me : No, I just arrived!

Laetitia : ok I went with Laurence to get Maeva's hair braided and we went for a walk in town!

Me: Okay.

Laurence was sitting with manners as usual. Laurence is Laetitia's big sister, who is my sweetheart, not to say wife, because I didn't marry her. Laetitia is the mother of my daughter, and I love her very much - in short, she's part of my life. We got to know each other very young and then we started dating when she was 19 and when she was 21, she got pregnant. Her family were not happy about it and kicked her out, so I had to take her in.

My mother had warned me that these white girls were going to cause me problems. Indeed, Laetitia and Laurence are of mixed race; their father is Gabonese, a myéné from Lambaréné who had children with a French woman. Their mother died when Laetitia was 2 and their father remarried. Laurence is married to a local executive who has far too much money, hence his malignancy.

In short, their father, with his wife's complicity, drove Laetitia away when she was pregnant. She had to come and live with my mother and me in the slums of the boulevard in Libreville. In my situation, I took good care of her pregnancy and thank God Maeva was born in good circumstances. Unfortunately, life isn't always easy with a diabetic mother, a 3-year-old child and a wife, but I'll always fight for them.

You're probably wondering how I did it? We didn't always live on the boulevard, there was a time when I had a father, a decent home and I was studying. Yes, when my father was alive, I did a BTS in accounting at the IUSO, and that's where I met Laetitia, who was immediately charmed - I'm not an ugly guy!

My father died and I don't need to tell you that we were looted and hunted like dirt. My mother was accused of witchcraft and from that moment on, everything changed for us. I had to work, learn to fight for my family - in short, it was a real struggle.

Laurence (getting up): Well, I'm off. I'm going to go home because with the traffic jams, I'm sorry.

Laetitia : ok merci Laurence !

Laurence : huum on s'appelle!

She walked her sister home while I went for a shower and left Maeva in the living room with Mom. Once out of the outdoor shower behind the house, I went into the bedroom, where Laetitia was sitting on the bed.

Laetitia: Honey?

Me: Hm?

Laetitia: I need 50,000 fcfa please.

Me (arching my eyebrows) : 50 000 fcfa ???? Where can I find it right now? What's it for?

Laetitia (supporting my gaze) : I need it to buy my brazilian!

Oh dear! That's another thing Laurence must have crammed into her head. Every time Laurence spends time with Laetitia, I always end up in trouble. Anyway, I know Laurence doesn't like me very much, I don't have as much money as her husband, that's for sure.

Me (sighing): Laeti, you know I love you and won't deny you anything, but right now I don't have the 50,000 fcfa!

Laetitia (sulking): But you did buy things for your mother yesterday, didn't you?

Me (looking at her): But you know I have to for her food and health.

Laetitia (twisting her mouth): Well, what about the rest?

Me (sighing): Listen, Laeti, when I get it, I'll give it to you. The end of the month is still a long way off

She said nothing and left the room, I know she's going to sulk but I haven't and can't do anything, I'm not going to steal. I went out and sat in the living room, turning on the news to see what was going on in the country. When I went to bed in the evening, Laetitia was sulking and turned her back on me. I looked through my savings and had just 50,000 fcfa left. If I give her that, how are we going to get to the end of the month? I only fell asleep like that.

For the past two days Laetitia has been sulking me, and to be honest I hate it, so to avoid any trouble I took 30,000 fcfa and gave it to her. I promised her the rest soon, and she immediately started smiling again. The days that followed didn't get any better, Laetitia became strange, sulking all the time, asking me for money all the time, money I didn't have of course. One evening, things got really heated between us.

Laetitia (raising her voice): I'm fed up with this hassle, you never give me anything.

Me: Laetitia! This month I've given you nearly 180,000 fcfa and what have you done with it?

Laetitia (looking at me): You think 180,000 fcfa is money? What do I do with it?

Me : Really? Today you talk like that?

Laetitia: You're always giving me the crumbs. I'm a woman and I need to feel loved and pampered.

What's she talking about? I pamper her as best I can with the means at my disposal. Sometimes I go into debt to please her, and what does she do with her life? Nothing! Even do a little business, nothing! Her sister drills into her head that they have to be looked after.

I love Laetitia very much, I'm in love with her like the day I met her, which is why I put up with everything she does, even when my mother warns me off. I don't listen because I love the girl, but the reality is that she always wants more.

Laetitia (with an evil look on her face): I'm here today because of you. I'm getting fed up, do you hear me?

Me (looking at her): But why can't you just be patient? What I earn I give to you...

Laetitia: what do you earn first? Tchuiip with your junk all over the place, I'm tired, I need a real man who can take care of me.

Me (frowning): What does that mean?

Laetitia (pushing me): I'm tired, I'm going to leave you in that rotten house with your mother!

She started to lower her suitcases from the top of the wardrobe. Maeva came into our room crying, probably because of all the screaming. She pulled on Laetitia's dress, who didn't even look at her, and took her things. I didn't know what to do, she wasn't going to leave me like that, was she? What am I going to do? My heart raced, and to see Maeva crying threw me for a loop.

Me (looking at her): Laeti sorry don't do that, look Maeva's crying!

Laetitia (annoyed): No, leave me alone, I've had enough!

Maeva (in tears): Mom... Mom!

Me: Laetitia I'll do whatever you want, but please don't go.

I held her by the arm, she pushed me but I was still holding her, she started hitting me, I didn't understand a thing. I let go, Maeva tried to hold her back but she pushed gently.

Me (deep voice): Laetitia please stay and do this for your daughter!

Laetitia (joking): Stay with her, for all I know she's your daughter too. I'm out of here.

Me: Laetitia?

Laetitia: Get the hell out, David!

I stood helplessly with my daughter crying in my arms. My mother was standing in front of her bedroom door watching the scene. I put Maeva in their room and went into mine. I sat on my bed in a daze, my throat in a knot, Laetitia had left me?

My name is David Onanga, I'm 27 and my "wife" has just left me. Now I'm alone with my three-year-old daughter and my sick mother in a big mess.