A Fate without Destiny

It was hot in August, and I was sitting in the back seat of the car with my mother because my brother Daniel was chatting with two guys on the college campus. Mother and Daniel came to drop me off the college I decided to study for the masters.

I dropped my phone, bend down to pick it up and suddenly looked outside the window where my brother was standing but accidently my eyes met with the guy standing next to my brother. I looked away feeling awkward.

In the evening, my family left me there at the hostel and went back to the states, I was sad because I like staying home with my family and spending time with them.

In the hostel I met this girl Janet, became friend as we found out we are in the same batch and have same classes, and rooms on the same floor.

In the morning, we were going for our classes when I saw the guy peter was chatting yesterday, I looked at him, but he avoided my gaze so I walked past him, I hear this voice, making me turn back to see who is calling but there is no one.

Now that its lunch time, I saw him again, he was handsome and had a lean physique, standing in the cafeteria with his friends. I told my friends that I need to talk to this guy. So, I walked towards him and approached him for a handshake and said " Hi! I am Julie, Peter's sister, we are in the same class, I hope we can help each other with the assignments and studies."

Why is this awkward, why is he taking time to shake my hand, Oh God this is embarrassing, I said to myself. But he shook my hand and replied " Hey! my name is Jonas. Of course, we can do that as we are from the same hometown. I was shocked because I was indifferent towards the boys from my hometown.

"Let's share contacts" he said. We exchanged contacts and then we didn't see each other for two days, it was weekend.

Monday morning I saw him in the class sitting with his childhood friend Peter who he introduced me and to my friend then.

We four became really good friend. Jonas started teasing me every now and then, in class, on and outside campus, like tom and jerry fighting all the time, our friends thought we like each other.

Well, I do like him, he is handsome and taciturn. Girls like to approach him, but he doesn't show any interest, I said to myself.

One day we all were in a cabin of a train to our hometown, it was night, and lights were dim, we were playing games and he suddenly insulted me saying "I have always hated the people with your surname, they are wealthy and dominating but you are different."

This is confusing, is he saying he likes me or he hates me, is that why he is always teasing me, I said to myself.

"If you have problem with me, I should go and sit somewhere else, don't want to bother you guys" I said.

As I turned and about to get up to find an empty seat, he grabbed my wrist and said, "wait! I didn't mean that in a rude way, I feel like you are different and naive, please don't change you seat and stay seated." I felt warm and happy because i liked him but I didn't know if he liked me.

We chat all day and night and became best friend. we would talk for hours without noticing the time.

He used a phrase when we texted each other "Madam I am your Adam", not knowing what he meant I ignored and laughed at him. One day, I got annoyed and said " why do you say this, do you even the meaning of that phrase". "Yes" he replied.

"Yeah! tell me?" I asked.

"I am your Adam" he said.

Is he annoying me, does he not the meaning, is he that dumb, I said to myself.

"It is what you are thinking" he said.

I said "what do you mean".

"I like you" he said.

I got shocked and froze there and couldn't utter a word.

"Take your time, we can talk later after you give it a thought" he said.

I didn't say a thing, still in shock.

I went to see my friend and explained her everything what happened. She and her roommates said, "see we already knew that he likes you". "Oh C'mon!" I spoke.

I gave it a thought and realized that it is impossible for us to be in a relationship because he is Daniel's friend and our fathers know each other.

The next day we met, and we talked about what happened. "This is not possible between you and me Jonas, My family will never accept you despite the fact you are smart and a have qualities what parents seek in the guy" I said.

"Why are you in a rush, we will be in college for 2 years, why don't we date and see" He said.

This went on for few days and he was persistent, trying to convince me into it.

For me this was my first love, and I had fallen hard.

After few days I told him," Alright after finishing degree I'll ask my parents to marry you and see what happens then".

He was happy and honestly, I was too.

We started dating, and then December came, we celebrated my birthday outside. He gave me a ceramic doll, a very pretty fairy doll, It was so beautiful that I was stunned. We decided to go on a night trip after that, it was chilly, me and Jonas were standing outside the car. He walked towards me so close, pushed me towards the car and then hugged me. I was shy and didn't act. He then started rubbing on my back as I was shivering because of the chill and this strange feeling in my chest. I tried to push him away but couldn't budge because of his strong hold on me. He kept rubbing on my back and said' " Relax it's not that cold, why are you shivering this much, I am trying to warm you up, you'll feel fine in few minutes".

He's right, I felt a bit relaxed but this tingling in my chest was still there and my heart was beating fast because he was hugging me and didn't let go.

When he saw that I stopped shivering he put his hands around my face and said, "Babe, what is it, why aren't you saying anything, it's your birthday you should be enjoying and feel happy". I did feel happy, but this was the first time someone held me like this and treated me this way. I was in a daze.

He then moved his face towards mine slowly and came in for a kiss. I budged him because everything was new for me and I didn't know how to act, one of the reasons, our friends were still inside the car. I felt a bit embarrassed because I thought they could see from inside and might tease me later.

He let go and said, " let's go inside we would get late otherwise". I was nervous and sat inside the car next to the driver seat, he was driving. Our friends sat behind because they have already started dating before us.

We stopped on the roadside for a while to take nap but stayed inside the car because it was late night there was nothing outside. Jonas put his head on my shoulder to relax, I couldn't move I was extremely nervous and excited at the same time.

He put his mouth next to my ear and whispered, " are you nervous?"

Are you Kidding me, nervous? I am anxious, I said to myself.

Then I nodded slowly.

He then put his hand on my chin and moved my head towards his face, slowly trying to kiss me.

This time I couldn't move, and our lips touched. I screamed inside.

Slowly, he moved his hand from my chin to the back of neck and pulled me closer. I opened my lips but couldn't do anything, he was kissing me slowly. I could literally hear my heart thumping in that silenced car. It was quite and just us kissing. Then he let go and looked back at our friends who were dozed off.

"Don't worry, they are asleep" he said.

Then he put his arm around my neck and pulled me closer for another kiss, this time it was a bit passionate. I was like a dead doll couldn't move but kept my lips open.

After few minutes he wiped my lips and put his head on my shoulder and said, " I love You". I didn't say anything.

Then we drove again, saw the sunrise and some sightseeing. We all enjoyed the trip.