et's

taring at nothing, while my he

e heavy, painful kind, like my body already knew

I slowly placed

felt d

looked d

erythi

d. Voices floated up from the street. Life went on, loud and car

zed on the b

You

t stop think

he screen for

de my chest tighten in that familiar, dangerou

't stop thinking

s exactly t

n't r

ything would spill out. The fear. The truth. The thing g

the sink as if it could hold me upright. My reflection stared back at me, pale,

e happening,"

d it, my body tol

. The strange nausea in the mornings. The way my emotions felt t

h it all..

and flat again

Russo's

n who destroyed my father, would b

f it almost m

mo

myself together the

offee. A

mo

ld handle it. That I could act normal. That I coul

I saw

in hand, sleeves rolled up. He looked steady,

ine, something soften

. "You didn't ans

as b

ng w

"Trying to

his mouth, but his eye

n't su

studying my face. "

dn't

use o

m yes. I wanted t

id, "Because

there. The city moved below

gainst my wrist. The touch was light, but

ith," he said softly, "you

ruth, he wouldn'

ickly. "We should stay p

ed. "You're rea

aid, walking past him. "This, us,

but I felt his eyes

dn't

ing out of tim

myself inside the bathroo

test box sho

yself no

see it, maybe it

I lo

ink l

orld

y breath broke apart, h

li

fami

enough to des

king, breathing, existing, completely un

ter that fe

p. I smile

was fall

ery meeting dragged. Every time Ryan looke

not

lways

y my hands fidgeted. The way I avoided his touch li

in the design studio after

ng?" he ask

thi

lie t

most told him everything. His gaze was

aid, even thoug

d when I try to get close, yo

did

me what's

g, I want

epped back. "

we keep secre

stopped be

ace. "Just tell me

I whispered. "

space, fo

someone who knew

was back beside my desk w

oiding me,

m b

red," he sa

se... stop try

tened. "I don

ound out, it w

When I stepped outsid

n," he

n't a

nt. Rain filled th

tside my building

you going to ke

d turne

nued. "The appointme

ldn't

he said quiet

ars spilling

aled like the weight of th

ngry," he said

estroy us,"

ead against mine. "

s wasn'

red. Despe

first time,

just cross

nged eve