leg hitting the pavement is
Click.
ff the buildings like a drumbeat marking the st
dy here. I can
in my chest as I s
metown are quiet this morning
the biggest decision of my life, and someho
forward
k. C
ter, my heart thu
iac
en caught doing something I was not
mother, standing across the street with
It is the one she always gives me when I a
calm, too calm, as if she already
y, trying to sound casual, b
row. "And what is 'out' s
ht of her gaze, the invisible
in the pit of my stomach, li
ys expecting more. Always waitin
" I mutter, my words b
You are never going
an they should, but I am n
trol, before she sees the tears t
look back
Click
oring the sudden ti
ed t
round me, oblivious to t
icing me, as if I am just
verything I have ever known. No one ca
iac
ice again, sh
ster, Vanessa. Her tone is full of concern, th
op. I do not turn to face h
e I can feel the weight of my mothe
she asks, her
talk to her. I
, I'm
ent, just the sound of the
waiting for me to say something, anyth
out this," Vanessa says. I ca
the world drown her out for a second.
life. I cannot be the pe
erate. I finally turn to face her, and her eyes are
you saying
ng. I need to find something for myself. So
per than I intend, but
her lips parting as if
eyes; eyes that still think I am her little sister, the one who
" she finally says, the words
from everything and be fine? You wi
her, tell her she do
llow the frustratio
," I say quietly. "At le
see the hurt in her eyes, but I cannot bac
n you," she mutters befor
Click
e, feeling a strange mix of relie
not with the expect
eathe. I nee
p wal
front of the bus station
, the words Tickets Sold Here blinking in my face.
hands shaking as I scrol
everything else is a blur. I cannot go
r of its engine making my heart race.
f leaving. The uncertainty. Th
uncertainty i
, my leg clicking lou
ide. The air inside is cool, a stark
quick look, but he d
find an empty seat by t
g. I do not know what I am do
hind me, and the b
ss my forehead against the window, watc
ears, I feel like I am