MEETING OF SOULS

ZOE CLARK

2 YEARS AGO....

Sweat was running down my temples, my heart was beating fast. "This plane isn't going to take off," a woman said right in front of me.

I looked scared at a couple I knew next to me, but they got off the plane and I ended up following right behind them. "Are you coming with us?" They asked.

I already knew the path. "You go ahead, I'll go later." The couple nodded in agreement and then they continued on their way.

When I looked ahead, there was a beautiful forest! The place was full of trees and in the middle of the woods there was a man waiting for me.

I instinctively walked towards him. I couldn't see his face because the sunlight didn't allow me to do so. However, his hair was straight, he had white skin and he was taller than me. I would have thought he was about 1.90 meters tall, and he held out his hand to me and I took it. I jumped in fright when my cell phone alarm woke me up, my mind in a daze. I looked around, realizing that it was just a dream. "Who was that guy?" I asked myself, suddenly feeling a great longing for a person I at least knew. I put my hand on my chest as I exhaled, trying to calm my heartbeat, convincing myself that everything I had dreamed was crazy. I looked to the side and saw my husband sleeping peacefully. It wasn't even 5:30 in the morning yet, but it wasn't long before that time, so I had to get ready to go to the doctor. I had an appointment for my routine exams. My book was in development, it was going full steam ahead, I needed to get it out as soon as possible since my publisher was still anxious for the release; my readers couldn't wait any longer and to tell the truth, in the last few days I didn't feel very inspired to continue the episodes. My 9-year marriage was lukewarm, lukewarm was even an understatement, it was frozen like the peaks of a glacier on Mount Everest. For my family and my followers On social media I made a point of showing that everything was fine, but the reality was different. We seemed like two strangers in the same house. My husband was not an attentive man, not anymore at least. Over the years he changed, he became cold and distant. Even in our intimate moments he seemed forced. "Are you ready?" William asked as soon as he walked through the door. The peck he gave me was boring. It had been years since he had given me a French kiss. I didn't even know what a real kiss was anymore, with fervor and passion. It wasn't just him who had changed... I had too. I didn't love him like I used to and I still wondered sometimes what kept me tied to this marriage. Deep down I knew why I was still here. I liked my privacy and living the way I wanted, but putting an end to this relationship would mean that I would have to go back to my mother's house and that included several factors that I didn't want to think about at the moment. I didn't want to regress. -Sure - I said dryly - Let's go. Since I was mugged, I stopped risking walking alone in certain places in the city at night. The man even made a point of touching my private parts and saying that he wouldn't do anything to me because he was in a hurry. Just remembering what he said makes me shiver. So since that day, at night I only go out with someone, simple things like the gym. William is the one who takes me and picks me up, like now. He waves and goes ahead. My little dogs Babalú, Manteiga and Paçoca run to the gate. One mistake on our part and they conquer the world. William hands me the helmet and we soon leave the house. He drops me off at the gym and returns home. It was like this every day. I am a regular at the gym and that is all that motivates me and makes me forget about my life for a while and slow down my mind, otherwise my world would fall apart. I didn't know if I would be able to deal with this now. During my workout, it is impossible to disconnect from the dream I had in the early hours of the morning. It seemed so real... tangible. This was the first time I had dreamed of something like this. In addition to being a writer, I am a commercial model and also a singer, not to mention that I dabble in choreography when I have time. Yes, modesty aside, I have some talents that I can't complain about. Next week, I would sing in a event in the city where my family lives, our band was invited and of course I couldn't miss it. I noticed men staring at me, so I didn't care, as a married woman I had to behave as such. I knew what I looked like, I'm black, I have a thin waist, legs defined by constant training, I'm 1.74m tall, and I also have beautiful, super thick curly hair, although it annoys me sometimes when I'm untangling it, I'm a natural fan of my curls. An hour of training wasn't enough to exhaust my frustration, so I felt a little lighter. Back home, I took a shower and went to prepare dinner while William played in the living room with the dogs. And no matter how hard I tried not to think about the dream, it kept permeating my mind. ***

''Take care of yourself'' William said when I got in the car. 'Don't worry, take care of my dogs'' I said as he waved, he was going to work and was just waiting for the driver to arrive.

During the flight I found myself sighing, lost in thought as I looked at the perfection of the clouds and the beautiful sky. 'Daughter! Welcome home.' 'I missed you so much!'' My mother Marceli said to me, wrapping me in her arms. I loved my mother. She could be a bit controlling, but she gave me space on one hand, at least when it came to my personal life. 'I missed you too, mom' I replied, breathing in her scent.

She led me into the house while my brother put my suitcase in my old room. Nothing had changed around here, and while it was comforting and nostalgic, it made me a bit anxious and apprehensive. "My God... what could this dream really mean?" My mother murmured thoughtfully, her brow furrowed after I told her about the dream I had had that I couldn't get out of my head. "Are you going to be a widow?!" She said suddenly, her eyes widening. "Have mercy, my mother! Don't say something like that... it was just a dream." I tried to convince myself of this while she looked at me from under her eyes, still with a worried expression. "You seemed to be quite disturbed by that dream."

''I just wanted to share, my marriage hasn't been the best lately'' I complained, getting out of bed. ''Married life, my love, will pass. It's just a phase.''

''Could it really be?'' I questioned myself internally.

***

''I'm not sure if my aunt is really on this street'' I said, looking around. We were looking for a fabric store so she could sew an outfit for my grandmother.'' I've been here for years. ''Let's go, we'll ask someone if we have anything'' I shrugged my shoulders, agreeing with her.

We were talking about various things and how we would rehearse for the show. When we turned a corner, we heard the voice of a woman who was sweeping the sidewalk in front of her house. ''This man you're married to isn't that guy yet. Yours comes from far away '' I stopped

statically staring at the woman, she had a look of conviction of what she was saying '' You know what I'm talking about, you've dreamed about him, haven't you? . He comes from far away.

I swallowed hard as I could feel a gentle breeze passing over my skin leaving me completely goosebumps.

My aunt dragged me by the arm encouraging me to keep walking. '' Don't listen, she's not saying coherent things. '' ''Yeah... it could be. '' My voice came out hesitant, when I turned my neck looking back

the woman remained looking back at me, without even blinking her eyes.

Another year passed and then the bombshell came. I began to notice William was acting strangely and increasingly cold and distant towards me. I gradually began to behave exactly like him. The truth was that it was unbearable to live in the same environment and something told me that he was cheating on me. Before I suspected it, I had dreamed it. I remember asking him, feeling anguish spreading throughout my chest. However, William told me in no uncertain terms that he would never do that to me. Even after hearing his words, something inside me told me with conviction that he was lying, and it was no different. I discovered that he was cheating on me with a coworker and the worst kind of woman possible. The lowest of all, according to what I had heard. She had a tremendously bad reputation in the city. I returned to my mother's house. Even though I no longer had any feelings, I felt angry and very hurt. When I even thought about cheating on him, he had the courage to stab me in the back. Lying on my bed, I remembered our last conversation.

''So you're really sure you want to put an end to all this, aren't you?'' I asked as a way of making sure. Even though I knew it was the right decision to make at the time, I didn't want to have to go back to live in my mother's house, especially after he got married. I couldn't stand her husband, but I had to swallow it. I also didn't want to be selfish. I wanted her to be happy, since she never was in any of the relationships she had, including her marriage to my father, may God rest his soul.

''Of course, it's the best for both of us'' He said in a very objective and cold way, he seemed to want to get rid of me as soon as possible, for some reason this left me immensely hurt and very angry.

''Okay, there's no point in regretting it later and asking to come back, I never go back on my words'' William even laughed disdainfully which infuriated and hurt me even more. It was incredible how he didn't care about me, he didn't even try to fight to get the marriage back, I felt disposable.

''Don't worry, that will never happen'' His presumption filled me with bitterness and resentment. But dominated by my ego I made sure to show that his words had not hurt me at all.

"Unhappy." I mumbled, wiping the tears from my eyes. I hated his stance and the way he had been treating me over the years, and I endured it all in silence. I called him several times so we could have a conversation about our marriage, as a way of clearing the air, but he always said it was all in my head and that everything was fine. I wiped the sudden water from my face, refusing to cry, even though my heart felt broken. My family welcomed me very well, and that was a certain comfort on one hand. Less than a week later, I received a message via Instagram direct message from his cousin telling me that his lover had had a heart attack and had died. I won't deny that I wasn't happy, but even though the woman had died, I still hated her as much as William. What hurt me the most was that instead of opening up to me when I sought him out, he chose to betray me by acting as if I were my own enemy. ''I will never again be as naive and stupid as I was, I will not allow any other man to invade my heart again.'' I had closed myself off to love, if someone asked me what the color of passion was I would say black, I felt my heart in mourning and tremendously hurt.