I had two enemies-Francesco Bianchi and his brother, Massimo. For eight long years, after Claire's death, I infiltrated their world, meticulously plotting my revenge. I waited for the perfect moment to strike against those Italian bastards. But who could have predicted that one glance at Massimo's daughter would turn me into a weakling? Marrying Elena Bianchi, an Italian mafia heiress, presented the ideal opportunity. She would be the perfect tool to help me infiltrate their ranks and exact my revenge. Yet, on the eighth day of Christmas, she became more than just a means to an end. My possession transformed into my muse. My reason to live. Slowly, my hunger for vengeance turned into a farce. My Christmas miracle. My little obsession.
Four years ago...
Elena
I looked at the white pills in my palm. I'm not going to take them. When the doctor prescribed these, and mentioned they could increase the chances of me getting pregnant-I knew I shouldn't take them. I hated him and I wasn't ready to have a child for this impotent dick. He should rot in hell for all I care!
I dropped the pill in the toilet and flushed, watching it rotate. I wasn't going to do it.
I didn't want to have children with that man.
"Elena!" I turned my head at the sound. I exited the bathroom and returned to the room.
"You think you're smart, you slut!" His palm connected to my cheek before I could face him-my cheeks turning red from the contact.
"Why didn't you wear the GPS bracelet I gave you?! You're really getting on my nerves! I give you freedom and you misuse it! You love making me hit you, don't you, sweet Elena?" he asked as he grabbed my hair, pulling my head backwards.
"I'm..i-"
"What's that sweet Elena?" He spat.
"I'm sorry Paul," I whisper.
"Good. Always know when to fucking apologise! This is why I love you sweet Elena, look at you." He ogles my breast through the v-neck dress he had chosen for me today. Paul, my husband-dangerous one there. I was so foolish to think he loved me. I followed my foolish heart right into the lion's lair. I thought Paul loved me but he I guess I thought wrong.
He squeezed my breasts, and sniffed my body, running his dirty tongue across my skin. I've tried washing it off-his touch. I felt so dirty anytime I was with him. I still feel so dirty, they don't come off. You're dirty. You're a whore. Look at you! Wretch! You deserve him! The same thing repeated in my head.
I closed my eyes as I tried to shut out those voices. They're always there, telling me I'm not good enough. Even in this loveless marriage...Have you ever fallen out of love and it feels like you never even loved at all? Paul was a man I looked up to, when he hit me the first time, I believed I was in the wrong. But as it became consistent..then I realised, the fucker was an abuser. Paul loved to portray us as a power couple in front of everyone. Everyone wanted to be me...Mrs Davies. No one knew how much makeup I wore to cover up the marks on my face, red prints on my neck...Or how controlled I felt, to the point of not recognising myself. I married Paul because of what I thought he could give me...a normal life-just like I've always wanted. As fucked up as my life way, the one with Paul was worse and I regret ever running away from my past. My home. My life. My family.
I deserve this because I brought it upon myself. I can't take this anymore...I need more time, more time until I escape. Soon.
♧♧♧♧
Trigger Warning: This book contains mentions of rape, abuse, and self-loathing. I understand that this is a Christmas-themed story, but the characters in this book find themselves and fall in love during this season. They eventually explore themes such as self-love and moving past trauma. If this does not sit well with you, kindly skip.
Additionally, I will explain a few concepts in the book. The Cosa Nostra is the Italian mafia family originating from Sicily, and in this book, part of the family resides in Wyoming, USA. However, the 'Ndrangheta is another powerful mafia family from Calabria, even more influential than the Cosa Nostra. Both are competitors, but they will operate as one at a certain point in the book. I will explain certain endearments as you come across them in the book. I hope you enjoy reading my book!
Update of this book will be from 6pm-10pm Wat everyday. Book updates may come in earlier, depending on my schedule. I truly hope you understand. I would appreciate any comment dropped-I'll respond to all of them!
~This is to all the emotionally wrecked females who just want their Prince Charming~
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