I had been a good girl all my life, but today I let it all go. I wanted to be his woman. So after months and months of thinking about it, I finally let it happen between us.
Initially, I wanted to save it for my wedding night, but Cory was getting impatient. So after months of relentless pursuit, I gave in. I wanted this relationship to be my first and last; I didn't want him to go cold on me again like he did in the past.
I love Cory, and I don't want to lose him, so on my 20th birthday, which is today, I intimate with him.
We had gone to the beach that morning, had a great time bonding, and everything else had ended in the bedroom that evening. This is my first experience; it was hurt, but he looks happy; I thought he was happy! Why is he acting so differently now? Mood swings?
"No, you haven't done anything wrong?" He muttered, sitting up and putting his clothes back on.
"Then what is it??" I asked almost at the top of my voice.
"Watch your tone. I'm trying my best to be patient, and I'm talking as calmly as I can. Please don't blow this out of proportion." He said sternly.
I couldn't feel the calmness he was talking about. He sounded tired and fed up; he sounded like he was about to walk out of my life and never turn back. How am I supposed to be calm about that?
"Are you happy?" He asked.
I desperately nodded my head, "Yes, I am. That's why I gave myself away. You make me happy."
We weren't where I wanted us to be, but at least, we were headed somewhere, and that makes me happy. He promised to introduce me officially to his dad, and I was looking forward to it. He got my hopes up, so why is he trying to dash them now?
"I feel like we're incompatible; there's a wide gap in our relationship."
"What gap?"
"The incompatibility, the differences, don't you feel it?" He asked. I was discombobulated. Which two people are the same? Aren't we all different in our own ways?
"...Tonight I realized that you're a virgin." He was gradually getting to the point, but still, I can't tell what's wrong with him.
I'm confused about his reaction, "I never said I wasn't."
"But you didn't tell me."
"You never asked." I snapped back, what about my virginity was making him so angry? I never knew being a virgin was something to be mad about.
"You being a virgin even shows how different we are. Your view on life and love and mine don't match at all."
My mouth dropped open, my heart pounded heavily. I was struggling to take my breath. Tears threatened to fall. My whole body trembled.
"You're not making any sense!" My voice shook as I spoke.
"Maybe it doesn't make sense to you now, but you need to understand that in life we all need a partner that's on the same wavelength as us."
"Do you think it's fair to hear about this after our first night together? Why are you doing this to me, Cory?"
He shook his head, "I'm sorry, Alison, this isn't working. We are too different to be perfect for each other. I know what I want, and I don't think it's you."
"What? What are you talking about?" I blinked. I was a bit confused by his statement.
"This whole relationship." He said. "It was a mistake. A mistake I shouldn't have made."
"You may be upset now, but you will have me to thank for this one day." He said.
I froze by the bed and watched as he put his clothes back on. My mouth went dry suddenly, and my heart was beating wildly. What was he talking about? I was boiling with rage, and I was holding on to the little sanity I had left. The pain I feel now can't be compared to anything I have ever felt in my life. This can't be happening. Perhaps it's a prank, he is going to laugh in a few seconds and say he's joking like he always does, and everything will be alright.
"Are you serious right now? Please tell me it's a joke." I pleaded.
"Alison, I meant every word I said." He buttoned up his shirt as he coldly said those words to me. I wanted to do something for him; he can't break me like this. He needs to tell me he's joking, or else I will hurt him.
"A mistake, you say? You pursued me for months." I thought that would remind him of what we once had, but what he said shocked me to the bone.