ella

th on a st

he rain beats the roof like a warning. It felt right someh

e a commander in battle. She wasn't a midwife. Just a woman who had birthed fiv

shouted. "No

I screamed - loud, raw, desperate. My fingernails dug into the blanket beneath me as th

th

cr

b

overwhelming relief. Tears ran down my cheeks as C

oy," she

bo

h wide as he screamed his arrival into the wor

moment, the world fell away. No more fear

t h

him Em

tren

name that sounded like i

e'd ne

-

e Clara's cottage, a new rhythm took over - soft breaths, tiny whim

ng finger at a time. Figuring out how to swaddle without waking him. How to coax milk from a body to

d fast.

time in months,

ast n

-

as his fat

the day he told me to leave. Sometimes I'd catch his gaze and wonder if I'd made a mistake

ught never

st week. We were drying cloth

place at his table. Bui

ke it was a fact - like the sky being blue o

learning h

that looked like fire in the summer sun. About stars with names I didn't know. About

hispered into his soft

d I took it

-

blurred in

ing me as the girl with secrets and started calling me by name - though I

needed the distraction. Needed to feel useful. Anything to stop the

g was alw

eath the f

kn

bo

nges of

I had taped it back together

where I came from.

she

s. The way I froze when a man raised his voice. The way

asked fo

ave m

-

d runnin

e, the darkness swallowing me whole. Clara would

r, niña.

t the dirt path

rgiving climb. I ran until my lungs burned, until my legs trembled be

rest. "You've ear

idn't n

ed to

training. Sharpening myself like a b

llas wer

Don Aguilla wouldn't rest until I was erased. I was a stain on their nam

I r

rai

ear

ng to be a v

nd I knew they wou

-

land, looking out into the dark. The stars

ing inside

arn

by Clara's late husband, his tiny chest

is always

t. The quiet b

rst words of a vow I would one day etch into th

one will ever t

he Ag

the

the devil

-